Archive for the ‘Funny Emails’ Category

* misspelling in the conference title

Posted on September 18th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Again a Call for Paper (CFP) to a conference. However just opening the email immediately killed all potential interest. There are so many misspellings, that I stopped reading it in the first place.

Secondly, the conference wants to attract all researchers from all disciplines. How will a hardware guy researching the latest time channel attacks and how to prevent them, discuss the “recent research” with someone from e.g. society? I do not say, it is not impossible to discuss research and to get new insights from a different point of view (read: from someone who does not work in the same field). However this conference is not a platform for doing so.

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* if you spam people….

Posted on September 4th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


If you send a spam mail to millions of mail accounts, then please have the courtesy of using a spellchecker and read once, what you wrote. Leave comments below, if you think you found all 4 errors (I think there are 4 only).

Your corporation is highly appreciated and I am hoping I could help you to annoy the world even better now. 😀

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* i do not accept the consequences

Posted on August 21st, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Dear Sir,

I’m really sorry for coming late in the lab today. It was all my mistake that I wasn’t there in the lab in time to attend the introductory session.
I can’t rectify my mistake but I dont want to miss marks because of my carelessness. If it’s possible, can you please allow me to attend the lab with the next group? I’m again really sorry for the inconvenience caused. I assure you of no such practices from my side in the near future. Apologies.

███████ ██████
███████
Group ██

Despite the fact, it is the student’s fault, it is sad to see, that the consequences of someone’s own behavior do not seem to be acceptable.

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* how not to talk

Posted on August 14th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


The students of IIIT-D organize a cultural festival called Odyssey almost every year. One of them is an event called Grammar Nazi. Despite the disputable name, someone contacted me on Instagram with the intention to invite me to this event.

There are some parts in that conversation which are in German. Here are the translations:

  • nicht meine Absicht: didn’t do it on purpose
  • ich habe dich nur über dich informiert: i have just informed you about yourself (informal speech)
  • wollte mit einem Deutschen in Indien reden: Wanted to talk to a German in India
  • Das war alles eine Werbesache: This was all just a commercial
  • Meine Aufgabe war es, Ihnen von unserem Universitätsereignis zu erzählen: It was just my task to tell you about our event at the university
  • Sei da: be there
  • Tschüss: See ya

Not really a convincing nor inviting commercial. Naturally I did not even consider to go.

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* is there a time overlap?

Posted on July 31st, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Subject: RE: IED workshop Lab and INE presentation
Date: 04/07/2017 02:09 PM
Sir,

I have to take TA lab (for IED workshop Lab) on Saturday 9:30am to 11:30am and 1:30pm to 3:30pm.
My group presentation in INE is at 12:05-12:20.
I will be present from 11:30am to 1:30pm at INE presentation.
Please allow me.

Thanks and Regards
█████████ ████████
M.tech ECE , IIIT-Delhi | ███████
+91 ██████████ | █████████@iiitd.ac.in

I have no idea, what I should do with that information nor do I see any overlap in the schedule.

Half the information is equivalent to no information.

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* emptiness

Posted on July 24th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Sometimes people are at a loss……

Subject: RE: IED workshop Lab and INE presentation
Date: 04/07/2017 02:06 PM

Sir,

Thanks and Regards
███████ ██████████
M.tech ECE , IIIT-Delhi | MTYYYYYY
+91 ██████████ | ██████@iiitd.ac.in

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* shall i tell you?

Posted on July 17th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Subject: Submission in IED
Date: 03/27/2017 04:33 PM

Sir
By mistake we submitted last Sunday’s,26th March deadline in someone else’s account.
So can anything be done now .

Thanks for help.

Ok, mistakes happen. After several mails, it became interesting and I replied:

Subject: Re: Submission in IED
Date: 03/27/2017 04:44 PM

In whose account did you submit? And then what happens to their submission? And for which group are you submitting? So without that information I can’t help.

Reply to that from the student:

Subject: Re: Submission in IED
Date: 03/27/2017 04:47 PM

Sir,
I know whose account we submitted on.
Should I tell you, sir ?

Thanks for help

This was the last mail. How will I answer that question and what shall I do now? 😀

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* internship through coolness

Posted on July 10th, 2017 by Alex. Filed under Funny Emails.


Over the summer vacation we offered several internships to students to work in various areas. After the application phase in which interested students could submit their cover letters and CVs, we had to sort out suitable candidates. One application had no text at all. There was only one photo attached:

The candidate wore even the same sunglasses. Would have loved to invite him for an interview…

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